New Release -- July 28th, 2011

[StoneFace]

Originally Posted by Farmer_Susan

OMG - this thread has 2,472 posts! Most new release threads don't make a thousand.

We're either:

1. Attracting more members
2. Bonding

or

3. Getting REALLY impatient for the new release

Hmmmmm . . . another doctoral dissertation . . .

Well, I suppose i could dig deeper into the joke barn, and try for 3000 posts.

or

I could just keep building my inventories...... and waiting

and waiting

and waiting.....

decisions, decisions, decisions


.

[Deborah1979]

OK, I have an idea....let's play a game, and list the ONE (and only one per person) item that was added to the game that didn't cost ONE COIN or ONE FC!! Sometimes, now I just take these things for granted, but I appreciate them. Some examples might be the belts/bonuses (which I hate, but collect any , the little yellow hand that lets you move items around on your farm, the bar now showing which of your neighbors are actually on-line, and on and on.

I'll go first (since I started this) Remember, only one per person!!

I really like the little yellow hand that lets me move things on my farm!

NEXT????



(oh, and StoneFace, you can keep adding jokes in between the posts, please!!!)

[CSLewis]

Originally Posted by Deborah1979

I'll go first (since I started this) Remember, only one per person!!

I really like the little yellow hand that lets me move things on my farm!

NEXT????

I have to agree. In one of the posts for a previous update someone said it was worthless and it should be deleted. I would go nuts without the little yellow hand. I use it all the time. But a VERY close second is the add to storage button. It makes moving trees and flowers soooo much easier and less time consuming. I use both all the time.

[StoneFace]

Deep within a Farm Town forest a little turtle (new animal, finally) began to climb a tree.

After hours of effort he reached the top of the Oak Tree, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.

The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds (also new additions to the FT animal store) sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate.

"Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."


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[StoneFace]

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?"

"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.

Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."

"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"

"No, because he's really heavy"

[StoneFace]

The Farm Town Farmer wanted a companion dog.... and the ft dogs were really silly looking.

So as he is walking one day, sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog for Sale."

He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a black mutt just sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.
"Yep," the mutt replies.
"So, what's your story?"

The mutt looks up and says, "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.

I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running. The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals. Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed.
He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. The owner says, "Ten dollars."

The guy says, "This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him, so cheap?
"The owner replies, "He's such a liar. He didn't do any of that stuff."



.

[StoneFace]

This guy walks into a bar down in the back hills and orders a mudslide.

The bartender looks him over and says, "You're not from around here are ya?"

"No," he responds. "I'm from Pennsylvania."

The bartender asks, "Well, what do you do in Pennsylvania?"

"I'm a taxidermist," replies the man.

Looking very bewildered, the bartender asks, "What in the world does a tax-e-derm-ist do?"

"I mount dead animals," replies the man.

The bartender stands back and hollers to the whole bar (which is staring at them now), "It's okay, boys! He's one of us!"


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[spoiler1041]

Originally Posted by StoneFace

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?"

"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.

Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."

"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"

"No, because he's really heavy"

That took me a second.....................

How many farm town addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just 2 but it needs to be a large light bulb.

HINT: Farm town addict is not part of the joke...

[Jamie's Jumble]

Originally Posted by StoneFace

Deep within a Farm Town forest a little turtle (new animal, finally) began to climb a tree.

After hours of effort he reached the top of the Oak Tree, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.

The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds (also new additions to the FT animal store) sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate.

"Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."


.

too funny...

[levarti2]

Originally Posted by StoneFace

Deep within a Farm Town forest a little turtle (new animal, finally) began to climb a tree.

After hours of effort he reached the top of the Oak Tree, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.

The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds (also new additions to the FT animal store) sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate.

"Dear," she chirped, "I think it's time to tell him he's adopted."


.

precious!!!!!!!